Facts, Feelings, And Emotional Bypassing Strategies That Suck.
“Feelings are not facts”.
I overheard myself saying this to a client the other day. Feelings are not facts.
It was a full moon. My astrologer has been talking about Mars in Retrograde which has something mucky to do with our feelings and communications. There’s a lot of garbage happening in the world. There’s a lot of real scarcity in many of our social systems. AND we’re in that weird liminal space between US Thanksgiving, Winter Holidays, and the New Year.
No wonder we’re feeling a lot.
But feelings aren’t facts, right?
Well, yes and no. While true, this particular statement is often used as emotional bypassing. Perhaps you’ve heard it before. Feelings are not facts therefore, your feelings are wrong/unnecessary/irrelevant. Feelings are not facts therefore, you need to make a different decision. Feelings are not facts therefore, you must be wrong/not enough/too much/too _____.
Unsurprisingly, I’m now going to call bullshit on all of that.
Your feelings are important to you, your business, and your decision making process.
Here are the facts: (see what I did there?)
Ultimately we are human beings and human beings come with feelings. We buy services and products with our feelings, we connect with other humans with our feelings, and even occasionally despite outrageously contrary evidence, we will make decisions on a feeling.
Both your feelings and your facts are integral to designing and running a regenerative business.
Why you do what you do. Feeling.
The passion you bring to your work. Feeling.
How you connect with your clients (even before the sale). Feeling.
Noticing red flags in a project. Often starts with a feeling.
The values you bring to everything you do. Feeling based in fact.
How your people know you’re a good fit for them. Feeling.
Your choice in colors, fonts, shapes. Based on feeling.
I’ve made my point.
The fact is, your feelings are going to guide you anyway.
What I would ask you to do is lean on your insights and your data to bolster your feelings in order to take a clear, aligned action.
Do your overall goals make sense for you and your life?
Are your actions in alignment with your overall goals?
Are you hesitating because it’s a wrong fit or it’s outside of your comfort zone?
Where do you need to focus to make sure you’re balancing both your feelings and your facts?
Feelings may not be facts but they’re still important.
Don’t discount them.
Don’t diminish them.
Allow the both/and of this weird and beautiful life.